I need to feel more connected to Him again and ask for help daily.

January 3, 2017, I wrote this in my journal. I was writing about SUPPORT and how I needed more of it from God and how I wanted to experience that more.

Well, God definitely answered my prayer by taking away comforts from me that have forced me to lean on Him for support more than ever this year.

And honestly, I just wanted to write out, for myself and for whoever is reading this, a thank you list to God for the ways He has supported me through this difficult season.

Thank you, Father, for:

  1. Co-workers who also are my best friends. For the hours of phone calls I have shared with them. For being able to laugh and cry with them. For them being able to relate to me exactly where I’m at. For their patience with me. For their unconditional support. For knowing that just because we are not physically in the same place does not mean I am not loved or supported by them.
  2. Mentors who also function as my best friends. For strong women of God who offer to pray for me over the phone or in person. For vulnerable conversations where I am not afraid of being judged. For the wisdom they share with me. For the perspective they give me. For the comfort they bring me in knowing that I can get through this with God’s help.
  3. Married couples who love on me so well. For being invited over for breakfast or dinner. For sharing meals at Panera or Salsa Limon. For having examples in my life of Christ’s love embodied through the sacrificial love of marriage. For seeing them sacrifice for me. For these couples following up with me so well and listening to me.
  4. My mom and dad. For not being afraid to tell them exactly what’s going on. For them holding me while I cry and staying up with me to talk things out. For knowing that when I call, they will always answer the phone. For the hope I can see for me in them. For feeling loved by them no matter what I’m going through. For my dad’s wisdom. For my mom’s care.
  5. Old friends that I can still depend on. For knowing that even if it has been months since seeing or speaking to them, I can call them up, and they will be here for me. For coffee with my best friend from high school. For FaceTime. For friends who have walked with me through so much already and can remind me of God’s grace to me in those times.
  6. Feeling known and understood by people who I actually do not really know. For finding blogs and articles that show me I am not alone. For words of vulnerability shared by women who have gone before me. For their bravery in sharing and for them inspiring me to do the same. For random acts of kindness that simply blow my mind.
  7. A greater understanding of self-care. For a healthy body that allows me to work out daily. For a cycling studio that leaves me feeling better about myself than when I walked in the room. For conquering shame and seeing a counselor. For massages and yoga and candles. For discovering that taking care of myself is so important and helps heal.
  8. My church community. For being embraced by them and knowing that they put no expectations on me to be okay. For big hugs and kind words. For sermons that encourage me. For knowing that no matter how far I run, they will always be here for me.
  9. Chi Omega. For this community of women who near and far, that I know well or that I just met, love me so big. For our Symphony that reminds me to be discouraged never. For a chance to make a difference in someone else’s life. For the lessons it teaches me as I travel. For my family. For my friends. For all the ways it has made me a better woman.
  10. My friends. For the absolute greatest friends in the world. For roommates who hold me while I cry. For my sister who comes over at any hour of the day to comfort me. For ice cream dates and funny movies. For every hug, word of comfort, and prayer.

I honestly have a loss of words when it comes to describing my friends and how much they have meant to me this year. God has blown my mind.

I read this list and I legit tear up. It is SO EASY for me to forget how gracious God is to me in the midst of suffering. Look at all He has given me. I don’t deserve any of it, yet He gives and loves still.

I pray this encourages you to do the same. To make a list of what you are deeply thankful for. You know, I think I am beginning to be thankful for the hard times too…because without them, who knows if I would have seen all of this beauty.

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